List Exercise (a Draft)

There are Enough Good Enough Things

Don’t eat alone.
Invite a friend to eat with you at lunch.
Oh, you have class?
Well, maybe something later in the week.
Talking on the phone with your parents
only counts as half of an encounter with a real person,
because really you’re still only by yourself.
If you spend more than two hours on the computer,
you must spend most of that time on homework.
Continually refreshing the browser in the hopes that
a new email will suddenly appear will only sour your mood.
Staring at computer screens can also dampen your spirits
and cause eye strain.
Looking at pornography is condemning yourself to a mossy life in a well.
Please don’t talk to yourself.
You are tricking yourself into thinking it’s normal,
and it unsettles the people around you,
which will only lead to further isolation.
Can you see the outlines of these ripples yet?
Carry your swim trunks in your backpack.
That way when you overhear a conversation about
people going to Rocky Point over the weekend,
you can pull out your bathing suit
and ask if you can buy the second round of drinks.
Stop writing things down.
Removing the English language from your working memory
will make you happier by making it harder
for you to articulate just how alone you feel.
If you have no language, you have no need to express your depression.
Ask him out for coffee.
Ask her out for coffee.
Ask the next person who walks by out for coffee.
You don’t drink coffee, but you know saying,
“Hey, let’s get tea some time?” would be vaguely deviant enough
to deter even your mother from doing so.
Don’t sigh.
There is no guilt in expressing relief that your life is almost over.